Lexa's perspective
by OizoMagick
Summary: This is ultimately a Clexa fanfic that explores Lexa's point of view on the arrival of the sky people and their princess.
1. Chapter 1

Finally I think most of the camp is asleep. A least my guards aren't, but that isn't new or an obstacle this is my nightly trip. I have had a lot of trouble sleeping since Costia was tortured and killed by the Ice Nation's queen. Every time I go to sleep I see her dismembered head pleading for my help that would never come. My generals had advised me against retaliation against the Ice Nation, since their queen had disappeared shortly after the incident. My fury was the only thing that kept sobs from forming. Still every time I wake up my pillow is soaking in sweat and tears. "Love is weakness." I prefer taking a walk outside and drowning my thoughts in war strategies and trade routes that the coalition can use without being attacked by the reapers.

I need to get out of this tent the air is to thick I can't breathe. I have to put on my war paint so that I can disappear and become the night. I slip out the back of my tent after carefully doing my nightly ritual of wishing my guards a good night, blowing out my candles and waiting for my guard to do his walk around the tent... Ugh, He's taking longer tonight.

I dash quietly into the forest a few meters away from my tent. The air is fresh, spring is upon us. My feet are careful not to sink into mud patches that could leave a trail, but I need to get far away as possible before any of my people spot their commander running away.

Now in the safety of the forest the wind stop chilling my face as I slow down my pace to a walk. I love admiring the stars. I feel they are the resting spirits of the innocents. I approach my favorite tree. Over the past two months, after my return to Polis from our borders with the Ice Nation, this tree has become my bed. I know every branch and could easily climb it with my eyes closed, which isn't far from the truth since I usually gaze up at the stars.

My spot in the tree gives me a full view of the night sky; all the stars illuminate it and make the nights much more bearable.

Tonight is a full moon, those are my favorite nights because the animals are as restless as me, and I don't feel as lonely.

The moon is hypnotising me as I study its shape. Someone once told me that the moon is actually getting further away from the earth because of the sun's pull on it. I can't help but feel that it represents my life has I'm feeling more detached from my people then when I first took command. Even after creating a coalition with the twelve clans after the death of Costia, I still have to worry about the attacks by the mountain men and the reapers. This constant edge that war has given me, forces me to endanger lives. I have to find a way to give the tree people what they deserve that is peace and safety from dangers...

'Heda' I look down at Gustus my personal guard looking up at me with a worried look on his face. Crap I wasn't careful enough with my tracks.

'Gustus' I reply giving him a solemn nod like he didn't just surprise me doing something reckless.

'Heda should know better than leaving camp without an armed escort.' He says in a disapproving way.

'I do not wish to disturb my guards sleep with my leisure walks.' I answer playfully. I can't let him know that I do this every night or it might be perceived as weakness at my still mourning my lost lover. Still he is one of the few that knows my past with Costia and has advised me well when I had trouble concentrating.

Then I look back at the night sky, taking its beauty in one more time before I am escorted back to camp. I see a shooting star 'Beautiful isn't it.'

Gustus looks up and says: 'My mother used to say if you wished on a shooting star the spirits will grant it to you...'

I wish I could finally find get a peaceful nights rest.

'What do you wish for Gu...' I started but stopped noticing that the star was not fading away, but was burning closer to the ground.

Gustus and I watched as the burning ball of fire was heading closer to the ground while the sun started to rise.

He looks at me in panic and states 'I think it has landed near Ton DC!'

I nod in approval of his concern; 'I shall send a scout to evaluate the damage the comet has caused.'

I get down from the tree in a matter of seconds, and Gustus and I start to walk towards Polis where my responsibilities await.

Upon my arrival I notice that the birds have started to sing and people were already voicing their concerns about the comet.

Great, this is going to be a full day.

I send one of my fastest riders to Ton DC to my general Anya. I was her second before I was called as Commander. I spent most of my childhood with her and hope that no harm has come to her.

**The next day**

My rider comes back and states that there were no casualties and that it wasn't a comet but a ship containing outsiders that had landed a few miles from town. These outsiders had already started to head towards mount Weather. A guard of the border had shot one of them to prevent them from reaching the mountain. Anya wants to know if we should attack.

After he takes his leave, I ponder at the idea of a ship landing. Where had it come from? Were those outsiders from the mountain? No, it couldn't have been, I saw it come from space not mount Weather.

Indra, one of my most loyal generals, and Gustus shall help me make a decision.

After long debate between Indra who wants the outsiders dead before they attack her village and Gustus who insist on knowing if those outsiders actually pose as a threat, I side with Gustus and send the rider with orders to spy on the Sky people while creating a perimeter around their camp as to not be caught off guard.


	2. Chapter 2

**A couple of days pass**

Anya sent back information that the Sky people have captured and tortured their spy called Lincoln, but he managed to escape. She wants to know how to proceed.

This offence cannot be accepted.

It reminds me of Costia and my eyes begin to water. NO! "The dead are gone. The living are hungry." You can't have a breakdown now. You need to show your true strength.

'Send word to Ton DC's general that troops are on their way to suppress the threat from those outsiders.' I say stoic eliciting a grunt of approval from Indra.

**That evening**

The rider returns informing me that after being fooled into a peace talk with a leader of the Sky people, Anya and her men were attacked by guns like the weapon of choice of the mountain men.

Of course outsiders don't want peace... Am I the only one that just wants to live peacefully and only have to worry about wetter or not food is going to be on the table this winter... I guess I am.

I summon Trystan, he is a ruthless general who has served me well in our battles with the Ice Nation before their queen vanished. He shall take the mission of killing the Sky people very seriously.

After explaining to him the importance of this mission considering that the sky people have an alliance with the mountain men now, I give him command of an army of tree hundred telling him to have no mercy.

**One day later**

The people were amazed at seeing another ship fall from the sky. It only terrified me. There is going to be back up. More battles and death are to be foreseen.

I quickly send a scout to see how the battle against the Sky people is going.

I need to find out on my own what those Sky people want.

'Gustus' I ask loudly. He quickly comes in my tent and bows at me

'Heda' He says looking at me sitting in my throne.

'Spread the word that I want Sky people to be captured and be brought to me alive' He nods and swiftly leaves me alone in my tent.

How can I find out what the Sky people are really like?

**One day later**

The scout came back from Ton DC still shocked at what he had seen. He explained in detail that there was a ring around the drop ship of corpses and cinder, but there were only one warrior left that had escaped death, but had suffered burns, who is bringing back a sky person that he captured. The rest of the Sky people were nowhere to be found probably rescued by the mountain men.

I noticed that Indra was listening tensely not showing any signs of weakness. How does she do it? Three hundred of my men were burnt alive and Anya was one of them. I could hardly contain my fury.

'We will march to the other ships to KILL the threat at once. Blood must have blood!'

**Three days later**

I now have two Sky people in prison. How should I get them to talk about their weapons and weaknesses?... I have to appear weak and unthreatening.

I dress as a servant and fake a limp to make the weak part even more prominent and am escorted to their cell with water for them.

My plan works because they quickly introduce themselves.

'Hello my name in Thelonious, and this is Marcus... what is your name?'

Wow he's very sociable; my people would have to be tortured to get that kind of information from them. Maybe he's trying to be friendly to escape. Anyhow, he isn't a threat I can't handle.

'Lexa'

Then they start talking about their intentions. Marcus seems to really want to make peace while Thelonious eyes the knife suspiciously. He might actually kill Marcus.

I inform them about the killing at Ton DC and they seemed legitimately surprised by this, but 'blood must have blood' as I tell them. One of them must die or the commander will kill them both. I'm being honest; I will kill them if they pose a threat to my people. I have suffered more losses because of these Sky people in the last weeks then in the past three months. This needs to stop!

Marcus attempts to kill himself showing true sacrifice for the sake of peace, but Thelonious disarms him and threatens my life. Gustus and the guards quickly arrive, and I turn the tables on Thelonious easily disarming him and pressing the knife on his neck as he did mine.

I restrain my impulse to kill him however. He is more valuable alive so he can send a message to the Ark people as they call themselves. They are both shocked to find out that I was the commander.

I turn to Gustus: 'Teach this man respect but make sure he can walk to the Ark to warn them to leave my land or be killed at first light.'

Gustus nods his approval and makes his way toward a shivering Thelonious. Marcus and I leave the prison cell and head to his room to speak about his people. I am curious to learn about their technology and knowledge of the sky, but I restrain my questions, it isn't safe... not yet at least.

As we neared his room, I tell him 'You will be sleeping here. You will be guarded and if you try to escape you shall be killed with no hesitation.'

He gulps and nods. I start to leave but he asks 'Can we talk about peace?'

I turn around slowly remembering the description that the scouts have told me about the cinder at the drop ship and the massacre of innocents at Ton DC. He gulps again probably due to the intensity of my stare. When he takes a step back into his room, I turn around and walk away.

I can't speak with him about peace, can I? I will seem weak won't I? I need retribution for the massacre.

Ugh too many thoughts. I call Gustus and we leave for my tree.

**That evening**

I have arranged for Marcus to come to my strong hold to talk. Indra and Gustus by my throne we must seem pretty imposing because he bows and doesn't look up until I tell him 'Eat'. He looks up and sees a servant make her way to a small table and leave just as quickly. He looks back at me with thankful eyes.

I could see by the way he ate that he was restraining himself. I admired that, considering he hadn't eaten in three days. My guard, my general and I look at him with a mixture of hatred and curiosity.

When he finished he said 'What happened at Ton DC? You spoke of a massacre.'

Indra answers 'Two of your men killed eighteen people from my village with guns.' every word was filled with hatred.

Gustus adds 'Villagers, elders, women and children were killed' he now spoke with the same hatred as Indra.

Marcus claims that they hadn't ordered the massacre and to be lenient towards his people.

After multiple suggestions from Marcus for peace, which were answered by Indra saying 'Blood must have blood', Marcus understood that a sacrifice must be made. I respect him for that.

'Since the massacre was not a planned attack by my people you can be sure we will not see the attackers as innocent'.

I could see the progress we have made this evening, considering that Indra had let go of the hilt of her sword. I had a guard escort him back to his room.

I ordered my warriors to prepare for battle, and move out toward the Ark.


	3. Chapter 3

**In the morning**

War time... again. My war paint ritual became so easy to do and I didn't even bother untying my braids before going to sleep. Anyway, since I barely sleep I never look dishevelled.

I ask my guards to inform Indra and the other generals to prepare for battle against the Ark.

Indra comes to my tent to tell me that her warriors are getting restless.

Then a guard comes in to inform me that a representative of the Sky people is coming towards my tent. Gustus and I exchange a look as he makes his way outside.

This girl walks in. She had clearly been in a fight for she had bruises and new scars on her face, but she stood tall. I hadn't expected someone my age considering Marcus told me about the functioning of leadership in the Ark.

Her hair was the palest blonde I have ever seen. It just gives the room a different light. Wait... you can't think like that. To distract my strange thoughts probably due to sleep deprivation, I started to fiddle with my dagger.

'So you're the one that killed three hundred of my men.' I exclaimed after a moment of silence.

'You're the one that sent them to kill us' she replied calmly. I couldn't help but look at her.

After stopping rants from Indra that just wanted to kill the girl, I got up from my throne and got closer to this girl who had fallen from the sky. She was offering me a deal I could not refuse, neutralize the reaper force, but I need proof. She offers to bring me to one of my men that they had previously tortured, Lincoln, and later became a reaper by the hand of the mountain men apparently.

I assemble a team with a few guards and leave the order to stay vigilant around the Ark.

I can't help it I guess I need to know if the reapers can be salvaged. I need this. My people need this. I don't want them to live in fear. And this way Mount Weather has one less outside force.

This Clarke of the Sky people is also offering to join forces to defeat Mount Weather. So the Sky people aren't as much of a threat, but they still had guns. My trail of thought continuing on until my boots are stained by cinder and burnt bones are surrounding me, this is a graveyard.

Clarke looks back at me. That's when I knew I was scared of her. She was ready to kill anyone to get her people back.

We get to Lincoln who is tied up, not moving. Of course this is a trap, how could I let myself be fooled by the Sky girl's pretty words of peace and alliance.

Then her mother hits Lincoln two times with a stick that makes him regain consciousness. What is this?

Clarke is staring at me, but in a gentle I told you so kind of way. I can't tell if I like her or want to kill her for lying to me about Lincoln's recovery. I decide to spare her life; I need her influence with the Sky people to unite the front against the mountain men.

As we return back to camp, I walk behind the Sky people and look at them curiously. How had Lincoln and this Sky girl "Octavia" formed such a bond?

Clarke looks back towards me a couple of times with a worried look on her face when her stares are intercepted by Indra.

As we arrive at the Ark, I request that Clarke follows me to my tent to talk about the alliance.

When we get there, I ask my guards to leave us to talk alone knowing that if she tried to kill me all her people would die in matter of hours and she would probably die by my hand trying.

'You can have your peace' I say sitting on my throne. I see her lips form a smile that she immediately suppresses and nods. 'I just ask one thing in return, deliver me the one you call Finn.'

She looks at me in disbelief her eyes watering. 'I need you to understand that it isn't going to happen.'

I stare at her as she explains her connection to Finn, this boy she had meet a few weeks ago that had become her beacon of light in this new dangerous world they had to discover. How she fell for him and was heartbroken when is girlfriend Raven came from space to be with him. How he was the first to think about peace between grounder and Sky people. After she was held captive in the mountain, how Finn had started to look for her thinking the grounders took his friends and how she witnessed the massacre in horror. The boy she loved...

I felt no pity towards this Finn, but felt sorrow for Clarke as she was torn between saving her people by forming an alliance and saving this boy.

She looks at my face. For a moment we exchange stares.

'Blood must have blood' I simply say. 'He killed innocents'

Clarke knew this to be true. Her face becomes bleak understanding that her attempt to save Finn's life was vain. She couldn't defend his acts.

She left respectfully and made her way back towards the Ark.

I later find out that the Sky people have tried hiding the one name Finn at the drop ship. I sent troops to fetch him alive so that the death ritual could take place and comfort the families of the dead.

The boy had surrendered and came peacefully to our camp surrounded by my warriors. It is now evening and I want all of my warriors to see the token the Sky people offered as a peace offering. This way we could all start having an alliance.

I hear Clarke outside my tent; I walk out just as the boy is walked toward the spot where he will die.

She exchanges a look with him then looks at me and asks that I show mercy. I don't wish to kill her first love, but I can't let him live he is blood stained, even he acknowledges it.

I make her understand that there is no point in arguing my decision is made. He dies tonight.

'Can I say goodbye?' she asks pleadingly.

I don't have the heart to say no. What would I have done to say goodbye to Costia? I can't have these thoughts "love is weakness". Chasing these thoughts from my head I look at Clarke hugging and kissing goodbye this boy with a bloody past.

I am shocked when I see her with a bloody knife and a wound on Finn bleeding out. She is strong. Same as me I guess, but no one I have ever known was as ruthless as her.

'It has been done.' I proclaim. I really didn't want to kill anyone tonight anyways. She is going to have trouble sleeping too.

Later I ask for an audience with the Sky people's leadership. Marcus, Clarke and her mother are now in front of me. 'My people think that the killer should have suffered the eighteen deaths he has caused, but they do not know that your suffering shall be even worse.'

I spoke from experience. Even though Costia hadn't been killed by my hand, I was the one that got her killed simply for being mine. I'm going off course again.

'We shall take the body and do a burning ritual at Ton DC so that the spirits can have peace.'

The adults are opposed to the idea, but Clarke chimes in her agreement. She seems exhausted; I wonder if I look as tired as her, I feel tired. I nod to her in approval of her decision to side with me.


	4. Chapter 4

**The next day**

I wake up in a panic but my sheets aren't covered in sweat. At least there is that.

We prepare for the trip to Ton DC and the Sky people join us. Clarke's bruises have changed color to a yellowish green compared to light blue or purple from yesterday. She heals pretty quickly.

This man called Bellamy speaks with her for the trip. I can't tell how the event of last evening affected her. I feel this curiosity, but I can't just ask her.

When we get to Ton DC, a villager refuses to let in the Sky people. I signal Gustus to take him out. When he starts bashing him, Clarke comes to me and asks to I let him live. I accept because upsetting her further is not something I am looking forward to. I turn to the villagers and warn them that the sky people and the tree people are in an alliance and that any attempt on their lives would surely cost them theirs. I think my message got through, I hope so, last thing I want to do is kill my people.

The bodies were already in position for the burning ritual only the killer had to be place among his victims.

Once this is done, my torch is lit and my hand stops and I look to Clarke. Maybe she will find comfort in knowing his spirit is liberated. I need to enforce that we are in an alliance.

'Clarke' I say handing her the torch.

She looks at me surprised, but then she says seriously 'You gonplei ste odon' everyone looks at her in surprise, but mine is mixed with pride.

We both stay looking at the cinder long after everyone else has left to attend chores for the banquet. Maybe I should share my sad tale as she did in my tent yesterday. Are we there in our friendship?

Who cares lexa? It's not like Clarke knowing you have suffered loss as well will disadvantage you in any way.

I proceed to telling her about Costia. I'm surprised at how my voice doesn't break and my eyes don't water. I guess I'm all cried out. I don't want anyone else I care about to be in danger that's why I don't care for anyone but my people, they are my main concern.

Clarke looks at me in disbelief.

Irony is us both loosing someone we loved has brought us closer because we understood each other. We had both killed for the safety of our people.

Maybe this alliance is going to succeed.

At the banquet in the honor of the fallen and the new alliance, the sky people offer a beverage for our toast.

'Clarke we shall drink together.' after her nod Gustus pours us two glasses. 'To those we have lost and to those we shall soon find.'

Gustus chokes and falls on the table. 'Do not let him die!'

I turn to Clarke who is proclaiming their innocence. 'Tell me, when you put a knife through the heart of the boy you loved didn't you wish it was my heart instead?'

'No sky person is to leave this room!' I yell.

I sent Indra to get the responsible for poisoning the drink "Raven".

More bloodshed, but it has to be done I cannot let this attempt on my life to be taken lightly. Gustus might have died, and I would have lost my most loyal guard.

I attach Raven to a post and start the ritual for traitors.

After her third cut, Clarke comes towards me with the bottle in hand proclaiming her innocence. At this point I'm ready to kill her. She drinks a quarter of the bottle just to prove her point and maybe to numb the pain she was feeling.

Gustus is accused and he confesses to his crime. Now is his turn to suffer the traitor's punishment.

I have to look at a man I have known for most of my life being stabbed by everyone in the village. He shows real strength and survives which means it is my turn to end his life with my sword.

'You gonplei ste odon' I say before pushing my blade through his heart. His last look at me was apologetic and understanding, it nearly broke me, but I can't feel this way about everyone because everyone dies.

Clarke and her people are glaring at me. My people are also watching my every move. I cannot show any sign of weakness.

The sky people start setting up camp on the outskirt of Ton DC and make a fire. Later that night, however the rain and strong wind makes me doubt that their tents will hold. Since our new alliance is in place I need to test it. I invite the sky people to join residence in Ton DC to show good faith.

'Clarke bunks will be made near my bed for you and your mother if you wish.' I tell her. Her mother, Abby, looks at me with thankful eyes for she hadn't slept all night because of the turbulence. The blonde girl just nods and the three of us head back to my room to "sleep".

Of course, I couldn't shut an eye. I just stood as still as possible in my bed hopping to drown in my sleepiness.

The wind had stopped blowing hard and I could hear the faint noise that rain makes on the metal plating of the roofs in the village. I turn around in my bed and saw a few meters away two deep blue eyes looking at me.

I wonder how long she had been this way and if it was because of Abby's loud breathing or if she was also haunted by the things she's done.

After a few minutes of staring at each other, I knew we would both be awake until morning. So I sat on my bed, and she looked up at me curiously. I got up and went up to her cot. When I was close enough so that her mother would not her me speak, I whispered 'Do you want to go for a walk Sky princess?' I had heard her people call her that affectionately and hoped that it showed I had no ill will against her.

She is slightly surprised either by my question or how I called her, but she get up quickly and nods.

We make our way outside and the rain drops start cooling my skin. We start walking silently next to each other closely followed by a guard.

I could feel her staring at me when we got to the outskirts of Ton DC so I whispered 'I apologize if calling you sky princess was out of line, Clarke.'

She shakes her head no but I can see tears forming in those deep blue eyes. 'No, I was just wondering if it gets easier?' She barely whispers, if the town were not asleep I surely would have missed it.

'It does... you just have to see it as what it is... weakness.' I answer

She looks at me in disbelief 'What is?... love?'

I nod

'I don't think I can stop caring about others.' She states.

'Then you put everyone you care about in danger.' I'm now annoyed at her stubbornness, but can I really be mad? How long as it been since I've had a good night's sleep?

We walk around the village a few times until my body is freezing and the only source of heat is radiating from Clarke. We make our way back to my room and she sight in relief hearing her mother snoring.

I take the towels my guard hand me and offer one to Clarke who thanks my guard with a smile. I nod to him and he leaves the room so we are alone to dry ourselves.

When her mother wakes up, Clarke tells us both about Bellamy's plan to become an inside man at mount Weather to disarm the acid fog. Smart plan, it is the biggest obstacle we face, but 'Can we trust this Bellamy?' I ask.

Clarke looks at me for a few second and says 'I trust him with my life.' She was sincere.

'Then we shall await his signal to move our army forward.'

Later that day Clark shares the plan she made to get Bellamy inside mount Weather to a few of my generals. One of them, Quint, is really annoying me threatening Clarke and the alliance. I think Clarke leaves the discussion to get away from him. I shoot her a worried look, but she simply walks past me followed by her guard who has a gun.

I stay in the war room to find out how many men my generals had under their command when Quint takes his leave as well.

Well I can't let him alone he'll probably do something stupid like threaten a Sky person. I take a minute to end the discussion smoothly and ask a guard to follow me.

It takes me five minutes to track Quint, but I accelerate the pace when I noticed he was tracking someone.

I see Clarke on her back struggling to escape Quint's grasp when he starts to ark is arm holding a knife I throw my dagger in his arm. I should cut his head off for trying to kill the Sky girl.

'You attack her, you attack me.' I say pulling my dagger out of his arm. He looks at me terrified.

I'm about the slash his throat when I hear the beast's cry. Oh crap, we need to run.


	5. Chapter 5

I pull Clarke away from the wild cries of the beast. Clarke finds a passage that might save us. How did she do that? She actually takes the time to look around for hiding spots while running for her life. Impressive

What we find is "a feeding ground"... we actually went into the beast's lair. That was unlucky. His savage cries are near. I see no way to escape this. When the beast jumps on my warrior and kills him easily, Clarke shoots him. He falls down. She actually killed him. I've never met anyone...

Oh! He's back never mind. Clarke makes a break for it and calls me. She jumps down a floor and I follow. My landing isn't very efficient and I fall on my shoulder. I hear it pop. I grab my shoulder in pain.

Clarke comes back for me and drags me to the exit. The beast grabs my leg and I try to hold on for my life. I'm pretty sure I'm about to die 'Clarke leave me!' I scream. I'm worried she's next.

She answers 'Never' and shoots the beast until he drops me. We safely make our way into a cage like room.

Okay we are safe here for a while I guess. I put my arm in position I need to replace my dislocated shoulder. Clarke looks at me in shock at the procedure.

'Don't you feel pain?' she asks

'This is far from the worst pain I've felt... I'm sure you have felt worse as well.'

She creates a sling for my arm out of her white undershirt. I could see her pale skin which had yet to be exposed to the suns hard light. It dawned on me this girl had only been fighting since she arrived from space.

She pushes my hair to my back which makes me shiver. I hope she didn't notice that. It's probably because no one touches me, not since Costia's death. Then she ties a knot so that my injured arm can be immobilized for better healing she tells me.

'You should have left me behind; now two will die here instead of one.' I voice my concern. She needs to know that her life is important.

'I'm still new to your culture, but when someone saves our life my people say thank you.'

'I'm serious Clarke... to lead well you must make hard choices.'

'Hard choices? You're telling me that?'

'I've seen your strength it is true, but now you waver. You couldn't kill Quint, you couldn't leave me to die... that was weakness.' I stare intensely in her eyes she needs to understand the importance of being strong for her people, as I have learned.

'I thought love was weakness.' she mocks

'Mockery is not the product of a strong mind, Clarke.' She is clever turning my words against me, but also very stubborn and it is irritating.

'You want to know why I saved you?'

I nod and she stares into my eyes.

'Because I need you, God forbids one of your generals becomes commander. You might be heartless Lexa, but at least you're smart.'

I can't suppress the smile that appears on my lips

'Don't worry, my spirit will choose much more wisely than that.'

She asks confused 'Your spirit?'

'When I die, my spirit will find the next commander.' I explain

'Reincarnation' she understood 'That's how you became commander?'

'How are your leaders chosen?' I knew that there were many leaders of the sky people as Marcus had previously mentioned, but I was curious to find out how they had come to be in a position of command.

Banging on the door stops our conversation.

'It found us'

'Don't be afraid Clarke, death is not the end'

'We are not dying here. I need your spirit to stay where it is.'

'I think I'm ready to fight. It's coming in'

'Maybe we let it in'

Clarke runs to the door and I follow she let's in the beast that slips down the room and we slip out and lock it inside the room.

'We should go'

After running, I slowed down the pace feeling Clarke drag her feet. I finally let go of her forearm and see the marks my hand had left on her. I was apologetic as I realized how fragile the girl that fell from the sky was. I vowed then and there never to hurt her again.

We start walking through the forest. I think we are a few hours away from camp.

When the banging of the caged animal had begun to fade in the forest I stopped.

Clarke was hardly lifting her feet. She needed to rest. I tell her to gather wood for a fire. We walk along side each other silently reveling in our survival, picking up branches as we strolled along.

She bumps into me a couple of times, I don't mind she's probably exhausted and I'd rather she fell close to me so I could catch her than for her to fall on rocks or something.

We make a pile with the wood we found and I teach her how to make a fire with stones. I give them to her just in case I'm not there to help her next time. Also, my shoulder still stings and she won't let me make the fire myself.

We sit next to each other and I feel her slide down to rest her head. I stay as still as possible. She probably felt me stiffen because she gets up and walks towards the fire to lie down and she falls fast asleep.

I'm amazed she feels safe enough with me to sleep, but I can imagine how much she needed the rest. I also felt drowsy, but my eyes wouldn't shut I needed to stay on guard in case we were in any danger. The Sky girl seemed to attract danger.

I was also surprised considering the night we spent walking around camp when we both couldn't shut our eyes. It must mean she has come to terms with Finns passing.

What does that mean about my inability to sleep? How come this Sky girl is stronger than me?

I need to stop staring at her sleep. I start looking at the fire. Thinking about the key element to fire making, oxygen without oxygen the fire would die... I need some air.

There I go again struggling to breathe. I push my back against the tree and concentrate on becoming the forest. I sometimes feel like my spirit just leaves my body to roam the forest free of any responsibility a commander might have, but this time I can't leave. I need to stay here and be aware of my surroundings. If not for Clarke's sake than for my people, I cannot leave them without leadership in time of war.

The Sky girl is woken up by the beasts' cries. He's all rested up, how about her? She looks around in panic a leaf still caught in her hair.

'Don't worry you're safe.' I try to comfort her.

'How's your shoulder?' She asks with a concerned look.

I try to move it having completely forgotten about it. The pain struck me, but I couldn't show it 'It hurts' I state.

The beast keeps banging more savagely on his cage.

'We should leave, the cage won't hold.' I say

She nods and gets up, the turns to me 'That's it the cage won't hold' After noticing my confused look, she explains 'Mount Weather has already let us in, all we need to do is uncage our army.'

I understand now that's brilliant, but it also leaves all our hopes in one man 'Bellamy' I let out.

She nods

'You have faith in him'

'I do' she answers sincere.

I don't know what they had gone through together, but I wished to have someone I could fully trust and believe in like she does him.

I get up and approach her, and as I take out the leaf in her hair 'We should go.'

I noticed she flushed. Have I that affect on her? We stand still for a moment, than she takes my hand and says 'Shall we?'

We walk silently for a few minutes and I keep shooting looks at our fingers intertwined to make sure it was really happening.

I just had to ask 'How did you fall from the sky?'

She smiles at me amused by my curiosity 'I was sent along with others to see if the earth was habitable for the population in space because we were running out of air and every other necessity you can think of.'

I understand that part it's all about survival, my people made sacrifices regularly for it.

'How did you live in space among the stars? I can only imagine the beauty of the view.'

'Actually what I liked best was imagining and drawing what I thought earth would look like.'

'Does earth compare to your imagination?' I ask in a low voice as I contemplate this fallen star.

She meets my gaze 'It's better than I've imagined, but very exhausting to adapt to.' She says smiling.

I proceed to asking her about her entourage, meaning Raven, Octavia, Abby, Marcus and Bellamy. She seems to truly care for them but she also speaks of people I've never met before which are trapped in mount Weather. Her shifts from happiness to sadness are quite entertaining. Clarke is a very expressive person.

It dawns on her 'I've only met them a few weeks ago, but we have become a real family, and I can't lose them.' she says tearing up.

We stop and she hugs me and cries. A tear falls down my cheek but is absorb by the blond locks touching my face. I could relate to her people, Clarke was very easy to fall for. Because she lets us be vulnerable. I never cried since the day my mother beat me up for whining at three years of age. Today I was melting at this Sky girls touch. What is happening to me?

Later we reach the camp, we long since stopped holding hands something about our moment was too personal and we both felt awkward.

'Lexa this is going to work.' she was talking about Bellamy.

We both walk into camp and are greeted by worried people. Clarke had her mother and friends; I had Indra and my guards.

Now is time for training...

**That night**

Exhausted from my hard day, I fall on my bed and drift to sleep.

Having not done my night time rituals my guards still think I'm awake and let the Sky princess in my room.

She doesn't mean to wake me up, but walks too loudly.

I open my eyes and get up 'Clarke'

'I didn't mean to bother you Lexa I was just wondering if I could sleep in your room tonight... you know in the cot like yesterday.'

I try to not look annoyed or happy at her demand, this is all too confusing. I nod my approval.

And she gets the cot that had been place out of the way in the morning, places it a few meters away from my bed. I looked at every movement and notice her hesitation when she finally decides to put the cot where it was the night before.

She says: 'I really enjoyed our time together except maybe for the times where our lives were in danger.' she looks away 'I haven't been sleeping well and it was the first time I felt well enough to sleep.'

'I understand.' I answer 'You can have my bed if you wish, I also have trouble sleeping but its comfort beats by far that cot's standards.'

She cocks her head at me and moves closer 'You were falling asleep weren't you and I woke you up.'

I gulp 'Yes' I say motioning for her to sit with me in my bed.

'Do you wish to talk about it?' She asks sitting down.

'No' I answer 'I just need to rest while I still feel the need to' I say playfully.

'Then I leave you your bed' she adds to a smile.

'We can share considering you feel safe near me and I need to sleep.' I propose.

As a reply she gets up and head towards her cot. Maybe it was perceived as an advance... I don't know the sky people's sleeping arrangements. However, she turns back towards me holding the pillow and jumps further down my bed.

'I'd like that very much' She smiles 'Heda.'

It surprised me that she used my title and I couldn't help the smirk that appeared on my face.

After completing my night time ritual as to not have my slumber interrupted again, I lay down in my bed next to a fast asleep blond. I close my eyes.

'Good night Lexa.' She whispers.

'Good night Clarke.' I answer as softly.


	6. Chapter 6

**The next morning**

I wake up to a sleeping Clarke. Her hair dishevelled from the movement in her sleep. I reach one lock of hair close to my face and stroke it with my fingers.

I catch myself in the act 'What are you doing?' I whisper to myself shaking my head.

I sit up in my bed and look for signs of daylight, but only the rays of the moon are visible joined with the chant of the crickets. I decide to get back to sleep while I still could. The Sky girl had the same effect on my slumber that I had on hers apparently because I was fast asleep.

When I opened my eyes for the second time, the girl was looking at me holding her head in her hand. I caught her staring at my necklace. She became flushed like the previous day when she met my gaze.

Now I could clearly hear the commotion of the warriors and villagers preparing for the day.

'It's really beautiful' she says looking at my necklace again.

'It is a relic pass down from generation to generation. It is said that its wearer must find a piece to add on before becoming a spirit.' I inform her. I'm kind of surprised that my tone is so soft.

'Have you found yours?' She asks curious.

'Not yet, I hope to have time to look for one in peaceful times.' I answer with a sigh.

'Maybe I can help you find one.' Her lips twitching in a smile, but her tone isn't suggestive it is more like letting me know she will help with this quest.

So I nod, I couldn't find a reason to deny her that.

'We need to get ready for the meeting of the twelve clans.' I let her know.

'First, I have to get back to the Ark to see if Bellamy has radioed in yet... I need news from my friends.' She's understandably worried.

I agree and we get up. I offer her clothes, but she tells me hers were washed the previous day by a nice family.

I quickly made preparations for the trip to the Ark. Indra meets me with an angry look on her face.

'Heda, you cannot leave to escort the Sky girl. She has become a nuisance. Our people are speaking. Taking her as mate will be considered weakness and your title will be questioned.'

'Indra I haven't taking Clarke as a mate.' I say defensively. 'We simply fell asleep going over war strategies.' I lied. Why was the truth that Clarke and I felt comfort in the presence of the other feel so wrong now?

Indra was still glaring at me. 'You must be careful who you trust Heda, remember she has proven her willingness to kill to save her people by killing that boy.'

This was true; Clarke did kill Finn just a few days ago. I understood that Indra was just being protective, but I couldn't help that last night was the first peaceful night of sleep I've had in a long time and I wasn't about to let anyone take that away from me.

'Indra we must trust the Sky people to prove that our alliance is viable. If not, we will have a new enemy after the mountain men fall.' I answer sternly. I really don't want another war to start because of who I go to bed with.

'Fine Heda... I will do my best to keep the alliance strong.' In the end, Indra wants peace just as much as me. That is probably the reason she took Octavia as her second.

'You will stay at Ton DC and greet the clan representatives that are early. I will be back before noon.'

After she nods, I join the group which included my fallen star. She was smiling at me, but I couldn't reciprocate the gesture in front of my guards. I nod to her 'Clarke' and I jump on the back of my horse and lead my group out of Ton DC in a gallop.

We reach the Ark without having spoken to Clarke because of our fast pace.

'Clarke, I will need you back at Ton DC later this afternoon to meet with the other clan leaders. It is important that they see that our alliance with the Sky people is to be respected.' I say to her seriously, Indra's warning still in mind.

'I understand.' She says just as seriously, her smile was gone. Maybe I should have smiled to her earlier. No time for self doubt my people need me so I leave swiftly.

Later that morning, I made my way back to Ton DC, where the twelve clan generals will be arriving shortly for our war against the mountain men.

My afternoon is filled with greetings, but I wait for the Sky princess we need to know when to move forward.

I'm disappointed when Marcus arrives in her place, but I know he is willing to adapt to our ways. I would rather Clarke be here to show the grounder generals who is actually the leader of the Sky people.

Only half an hour later, Clarke and the guard I had appointed to her safety gallop in Ton DC.

'Clarke has graced us with her presence.' I say sarcastically, I didn't know if she would take it well. I hope so, but she has completely disregarded my order when she sent Marcus in her place.

'Sorry for being late. Commander may we speak in private?' She asks with a pleading look, but her voice is stern.

I nod and we make our way down to the war room.

She informs me that Bellamy has found out a bomb is going to hit Ton DC in a few hours.

'We need to evacuate.' She tells me.

We both know that isn't an option. Yes it will be a big blow but we cannot let the mountain men know we have an inside man or our plan is ruined.

Her eyes are watered. She is scared of death. This fearless warrior that has and still is sacrificing people she loved to save the 47 inside mount Weather is now shaking in front of me.

That's when I realize I cannot let her die. I need to protect her from this attack and any other harm that comes to her, she is too important. Why? Is it because you identify to her? No it's because I was able to think about nothing for the first time in a long time when we were walking in the rain.

'Put this on we need to leave now.'...

I need to take her as far away from Ton DC as possible I have never seen a bomb, but the things I've heard do not make me want to either.

We are running through the forest when she stops. She saw her mother walking into the village.

She runs of before I can knock her unconscious to continue our escape. Damn it. She better hurry up that bomb should it very soon.

I'm a few miles from camp, running away from it. I hear the roar from the missiles projection and watch in horror as a cloud of smoke forms on top of Ton DC.

I can't let her die! I start running back towards the village.

**Finally found her**

She is a few meters away from me, but she doesn't hear me screaming her name. So I grab her arm. When she looks at me I see the pain in her eyes, did I make the right decision? Of course I did, we needed to sacrifice the few to save the many. I cannot let her endanger herself in the ruins of Ton DC.

I pull her into the forest where she breaks down, crying. She hugs me and cries into my shoulder. I automatically wrap my arms around her as if shielding her from the outside world.

What am I doing? "Love is weakness" you cannot feel this way about her, especially of an outsider.

We stay like this for a few minutes, and then I reluctantly push her away and say 'We need to get away from here.' She nods still puffy from crying.

We start walking, but I'm practically dragging her, when we hear gunshots.

'The spotter' she whispers.


	7. Chapter 7

'He is here to make sure we are dead Clarke. I do not want mount Weather to send another bomb.'

'He won't... because I'll kill him.' She says sternly as she walks towards the sound of the firearm.

We walk silently through the night, following the gunshots. I know that the mountain man is still killing my people from a high ground. We need to get there before sunrise to have the element of surprise on our side.

I notice Clarke is tensely holding her gun, which makes me uncomfortable. I know she feels anger towards the mountain men as do I. They have taken so much from us both. That why it is important that we win the war against mount Weather. So I cannot let her be in harm's way... neither can I. She needs to calm herself to think rationally.

'I feel your anger Clarke, but the only thing that will make you feel better is winning this war.' I try.

'That's enough!' She lets out turning to face me.

We both stare at each other. I know I'm right; killing one man will not make me feel better about the hundreds of grounders stuck in the mountain. Still she looks at me with defiance. She needs this kill. I can only follow her and make sure she doesn't get herself killed. Our stare down is interrupted by a sound in the bushes.

Lincoln comes out of the shadows and is surprised to see us.

'Clarke... Commander... Octavia said she saw...'

'Is Octavia okay?' Clarke immediately asks.

'Yes we were in the forest when it happened.'

Clarke lets out a relieved sigh. 'Good I was scared harm had come to her... We are going to kill them for this.' She looks to me and I nod. We were both furious and need revenge.

The three of us start walking again to find the shooter.

As we are walking, I have to concentrate on staying stone faced; I can't seem weak in front of Lincoln. I had already exposed too much of myself to Clarke and I cannot show anymore signs of weakness.

We reach the high grounds when to sun comes up. I look towards Ton DC and see the smoke still coming out of the ruins. I have trouble stopping the tears in my eyes. Then I hear another gunshot and I go into commander mode. I need to protect my people from this assault.

After hiking a few more minutes, we are shot at and we hide behind a boulder.

'Ill draw his blood.' Lincoln proclaims

'No, I will!' Says Clarke before getting up and firing her gun in the shooters direction.

I signal Lincoln to use the distraction Clarke is making to approach the enemy.

I then take Clarke by the hand and we outflank the spotter.

We can now see the beating the shooter is receiving from Lincoln and I'm proud of him. He is a strong warrior. Then the man takes out the frequency gadget that gives him the upper hand in his battle versus Lincoln.

Clarke goes towards them gun pointed at them. The shooter is now using Lincoln as a human shield.

'Clarke go...Your people need you.' Lincoln says pleadingly.

'You are my people.' She answers before shooting through Lincoln to kill the mountain man without hesitation.

She can be scary at times and then seem so innocent. How is it possible?

'Did that make you feel better?' I ask knowingly.

'No.' She answers as tears stream down her cheeks.

I go towards her to wipe them off, but before I get the chance she does and turns towards Lincoln. 'He wasn't wearing a hazmat suit Lexa.' After a moment where all three of us were digesting this observation, we now knew that the remainder of the hundred were in grave danger. She moves towards Lincoln to apply pressure on his wound.

'We need to get back now.' I say with a sense of urgency.

We don't talk for the trip back. Lincoln applying pressure on his wound, Clarke probably thinking about her friends and I was preparing something to say to the twelve clan representatives to make sure our attack on mount Weather happens without any reconsideration on their parts.

As we leave the forest and near Ton DC night as already fallen, Clarke and I are shocked to see the amount of damage the bomb has caused. Everyone is whispering "Heda" and I can feel all their stares on me. I need to make a statement; one that will take advantage of their anger and put it to use against the mountain men.

'The dead will be avenged!' I roar as everyone screams in approval.

Clarke's mother interrupts the war screams coming from Tree clan as much as from Sky people to ask them to concentrate on the wounded still caught inside the wreckage.

I can still see the shock on Clarke's face. 'We have our two people working together. We will win this war Clarke.' I try to comfort her.

She nods and looks back to the injured lying on the ground waiting to be treated by her mother.

I take leave from her and head towards the surviving clan leaders and the seconds that have taken this new responsibility. As I get near them, they bow their heads in respect.

'Clarke took down the shooter, but the threat of the mountain is still upon us. We need to make our way towards the border of mount Weather, if not we will continue to be assaulted and we need to be as close to them for when the time comes to attack. Gather your troops we are leaving tonight. This offense will not be taken lightly.' I end my speech and look at each person looking to enforce my statement. Everyone answers with 'Yes Heda!' even the Ice nation's representative, a second who had taken the responsibility of leader because their general had died in the bombing, nods and hurries to get his troops. He is young; this war has taken from all of us I realized.

We are going to battle.

When they have left me, I go looking for Indra. I find her shortly. She is wounded by a gunshot that had gone through her shoulder, much like the wound Clarke had inflicted on Lincoln. I hate guns. They have taken too many of my people, but I am proud to see that my warriors are survivors.

'Heda.' She says with a nod.

'Indra, we are advancing towards the mountain.'

'I will make my man ready.' She says beaming. Seeing my worried look towards her wound she says. 'It is merely a flesh wound Heda nothing I cannot handle.'

I am comforted to see that her strength did not waver. I'm going to need it very soon.

She leaves towards Octavia and I head towards Clarke. She is explaining to her mother that the bone marrow treatments are working.

'We are leaving.' She tells her mother as she sees me walking towards them.

'You'd better hurry.' Her mother says with a worried look on her face. Abigail couldn't control her daughter's decision to partake in war.

'It's time.' I tell Clarke as I pass by them. She follows after a shared nod with her mother.


	8. Chapter 8

We start walking towards the mountain in the night. I can't help but look at the stars. How many more of my people have become stars after tonight?

I now had this guard, Chedoux, almost as big as Gustus, but he doesn't share his knowledge of the forest and war strategies. Though not as strong as Gustus I guessed (no one was stronger than him). I was saddened at the thought of my lost protector. His presence would have comforted me in this time of war.

I ask him to find out the number of casualties the bomb had made. Chedoux came back shortly after, 'The Ice nation's general who was there for the rescue estimated the body count at 250 killed.' He says as if not believing the words that came out of his mouth.

I surely didn't think... my decision had cost the lives of 250 people. I see Clarke staring at me. She had heard my guard as well. I look up at the stars. I would give anything to just find my tree again before any of these deaths had occurred. No, the threat of the mountain will end soon and my people will finally live unthreatened.

Clarke comes to walk besides me.

'We are almost there Clarke. My guards will set up my tent as soon as we arrive.' I inform her.

She bends down and picks up a branch, then another one until she has an armful. 'What are you doing Clarke? It is not our place as leaders to make fire.'

'If they are busy setting up camp we can surely make a fire. I mean, you don't have to. I know how to make fire.' She says looking intensely in front of her.

'Very well.' I answer before yelling: 'SET UP CAMP HERE!' we can't go further or we will be victims of the acid fog.

My guards start working on my tent. Clarke starts pilling up the branches like I taught her and I sit near her. Then she struggles a bit with the fire stones, but the spark does catch and she created a fire.

'Well done.' I congratulate her impressed.

'I had a good teacher.' She says playfully before sitting next to me. 'As soon as Bellamy deactivates the acid fog and the flare goes up we need to be ready to attack.'

I nod still looking at the stars. Clarke lies on her back and says: 'I've seen you a couple of times just looking at the stars is there a reason?'

'I admire the spirits of the fallen. It is my only comfort to know they have found peace up there.'

'Beautiful... I know my father's is.' She whispers.

I look down at her lying on the ground admiring the night sky. It is nice to share this with someone that understands the suffering that comes with sacrifice.

'Your tent is ready Heda.' My guard informs me.

'That means yours is as well Clarke.' I tell her because she is not getting up.

She reluctantly gets up and follows me inside the tent. I thank my guards and tell them to go help the others set up camp as well.

I lay down in my bed tired of the long day and night of walking. Morning was almost here and I needed to rest as does Clarke. The Sky princess doesn't seem to want it. As soon as we walk in the tent she stares at the map of the surrounding area. I know she is exhausted, but death keeps us both awake.

Clarke is on edge 'What if we are wrong, cutting the power doesn't disengage the locks.'

'Your people said it will.' I open my eyes and see her hovering over the maps. 'You should rest Clarke.' I offer getting up from bed.

'We can blow the doors manually.' She hadn't heard a word I said. This is driving her mad.

'Plans don't last very long in battle.' I say as I let out a sigh. When I am near her and I am sure she can hear me. 'Tiring yourself with answers that have already been answered is a waste of energy.' I say seriously. I really don't need her to have a break down when we are on the verge of war.

'People died for this Lexa... It has to work.'

I try to comfort her by relating with her experience, but all I wanted to do was slap her out of it, so I walk away.

'Once Bellamy shut down the acid fog and the battle begins everything will be clear.' I say reassuringly to make her stop worrying.

'What if he can't... What if it was too dangerous and I sent him there anyway?' She says with guilt.

'You care about him?' I ask. I'm curious about their bond. A bit worried they share something that we cannot due to our leadership roles.

'I care about all of them.' She says disapproving of my question.

'Yet you care about him more.' I add accusingly, like she was doing something wrong. Why am I being so pushy?

'I couldn't have kept us alive all this time without him. We need him...and now I might be the one that gets him killed.' It comforts me somewhat that she doesn't see him as a mate, but as a fellow leader of their people.

'That's what it means to be a leader Clarke. The truth is we must look in the eyes of our warriors and say "go die for me".' I say to encourage the decision she made.

'If only it were that easy.' She says with a disapproving look. 'Can we just get back to the plan?'

'No.' She needs to understand that the responsibility of being a leader cannot be influenced by feelings. 'You can be a leader people look up to. Pour their hopes and dreams into. Someone they would fight and die for.'

'I never asked for that... I'm just trying to keep us alive.' She turns her back on me. She clearly doesn't see the influence she has on her people. Bellamy became an inside man after she told him to, Raven will create anything Clarke tells her to, her mother and Marcus listen to every word she says. She is a leader in every way.

'You were born for this Clarke... same as me.' I said hoping I had gotten through to her.

I go outside my tent to get some air. Arguing with Clarke is not something I should be doing right before going to war, but I feel like she could become the bridge towards peace between our two people. She had certainly earned my respect as well as Indra's. A good indicator is when Indra stopped threatening her life and started to take orders from Clarke.

I head back inside my tent to escape the sounds of my warriors setting up camp very loudly. Inside I go back to my bed and lie down my sleepiness totally gone.

'Ok you want me to get my mind of these plans, come take a walk with me. It helps me think of other things.' She offers.

I get up maybe too quickly at this offer. She smirks knowing that I need this too.

As we get out of the tent, it is still dawn and my guards are helping to organize the camp so the coast is clear. We sneak into the forest. Great more walking I tell myself sarcastically. 'Do you have an idea of where we are going Sky girl?'

'If I tell you than there is no mystery.' She says playfully taking my forearm. 'The surprise is the best part isn't it.' Now half-dragging me.

We get further away from the mountain and our new campsite. I realise where she is bringing me. The drop ship she fell from the sky on. I don't understand why she is bringing me back to that graveyard and I stop her. She sees the worried look on my face and decides to tell me her plan. 'Do you have your necklace on you?'

I'm still confused, but I take it from inside my shirt. It is a long piece of rope with six little relics three in metal two in plastic and one wooden. Clarke come near me and takes the necklace in her left hand gently tugging me towards her. I can't help but blush at this closeness. She studies it and looks at me smiling. 'I think this is the best place to find your legacy Lexa. There is a lot of burnt metal and plastic from the drop ship.'

'Clarke...' I take her hand still holding my necklace. 'I cannot be here. This ground is covered by my people.' I say pushing her away.

'We both made decisions that cost us Lexa. It is our choice to be haunted by them isn't that what you told me earlier in the tent.'

'I am not haunted Clarke.' I say walking towards the drop ship. 'See!'

We are both staring at each other from a few meters. It goes on for what feels like an eternity.

'Ok then let's treasure hunt!' Offers Clarke joyfully.

We race towards the drop ship and start looking for... I'm not sure what but it distracts us both. We are concentrating so intently on finding it noon arrives and we start feeling hungry.

'I know where we can find berries.' Clarke offers.

We make our way towards the berries and almost eat all of them. Some are left and Clarke insists on us playing a game. I need to catch a berry she throws with my mouth. It is fun and of course the sky girl's aim is terrible. I'm lucky I ate before this game, but she seems to enjoy it.

When all our berries have been used we head back towards the drop ship. I really want to hold her hand, but there would be no reason to.

When we arrive Clarke accelerates the pace and stops near the machine. 'Hey Lexa come over here.' She calls.

I go over and see the object she is holding; it's a metal strip that has melted making a twist where a rope can easily pass through and it has the shape of a wing. It is remarkable how this angel fallen from space had found a wing.

I look at her in disbelief. This is perfect.

'It's perfect isn't it?' She asks looking at my reaction.

I nod. 'Wouldn't you prefer to keep it Clarke to make a necklace of your own?'

'I thought you were looking for a piece Lexa. Don't you like it?' She asks disappointed.

'It really is... but it found you Clarke. I would like you to keep it as a reminder of who you are.' An angel I added in my head.

She gets closer to me and smiles. She reaches behind my neck and begins to untie the knot. I close my eyes at her touch and I can now smell her hair. It smells like the forest after a morning mist. After having untied it, she tries to put the relic unto the rope and it fit perfectly.

'Fine Lexa, but you're going to have to hold on to it until I find a necklace of my own.' She says beaming. Then she adds playfully. 'Meanwhile you will have to think of me.'

I love this girl. I can't deny it; I've fallen for her... No I can't have!

I take my necklace back and tie it quickly as a response, placing it back under my shirt.

I then hold up a knife that was tied on my calf and hand it to her.

'What this for?' She asks confused.


	9. Chapter 9

If I can't love her then I'll fight her. 'We should practice fighting Clarke a battle is near and your gun may empty, but this knife won't fail you.'

She stares at me disbelieving what I said, but quickly understands that I am not kidding when I take out my dagger and position myself in an offensive stance.

I show her the basic defense against a close range assailant. Then I show her how to overtake someone threatening you from behind. Just as I did with Thelonious, I slam Clarke to the ground.

It actually pained me to do so. Why? Come on Lexa "Love is weakness" don't be weak for her. Show your strength.

Clarke actually asks me to show her that technique again. So I oblige, slamming her on the ground again. She stares at me from the ground as I get up and I try to look anywhere else than those blue eyes.

'Okay, I think I get it.' She says. She then takes my arms and guides me to her back. She tries to do the technique, but I reverse it on her and we are facing each other too close for my comfort.

'You need to twist my arm so that I cannot do anything else but fall.'

She nods gulping at the proximity my dagger has with her throat. I take my arm off from around the back of her neck. 'Do it again.' I order.

She does, but it is as bad as the first time and we are close to each other again with barely any space separating us. Maybe training was not the best idea to bury my feelings for her.

She is now holding my shirt tightly and I can't push her off as I did the first time. She shouts 'That's not fair Lexa. You have been practising for so long.'

I don't find it funny that she is holding me in to this closeness. I can't seem to look away from her lips. Somehow I gather the strength. 'Clarke' I say placing my hands on hers so she will ungrip me. 'Your enemy might have more training than you do one day and it won't stop him from killing you.'

'Okay, I think I can do it.' She claims.

After the third time, I can't take it anymore. I can't be stuck in that closeness again. I trip her and straddle her on the ground still holding my dagger. This is even worse, what was I thinking. I get up as fast as I fell.

'Clarke I am disappointed in your man to man combat skills.' I say looking away from her as she gets up hiding my blush.

'Can I have one more try Lexa, please.' She is now pleading. This really was a bad idea.

I normally wouldn't have broken a sweat for these types of manoeuvres, but my heart was racing and my palms were sweaty. I hate myself for proposing this.

'You really need to concentrate Sky girl the enemy will not be as lenient as me.' I am truly concerned for her well being at this point.

'Okay come here then, so I can practice.'

I place my arms around her again, holding my breath so that I don't breathe her in. I gasp as the air is pulled out of me when I land on the ground. She has done it perfectly.

Her knife pointed at my throat she leans in closer and whispers 'How was that commander?'

She just called me by my title again. It's so... Wait... I am Heda of the tree clan I cannot be here wasting time when my people are in a war. Okay this was getting to be too much for me to handle, so I push her off me and she rolls to my side laughing and I get up.

'Where are you going?' She asks panicking at my leaving.

'We are heading back to camp Clarke. Our people need our full attention.' I state.

She jogs to catch up to me.

'Thank you for the tips, I'm sure they will come in handy one day.'

'I hope you don't have to be in those kinds of situations, but I am comforted you will know how to save yourself.' I say as sternly as possible. My feelings cannot control me. I am the Heda. I can't have any weaknesses.

We head back to camp and to our responsibilities. We have evaded them for long enough now.

A mile later I see a pheasant lying dead in a trap. We have been placing many yesterday to feed our armies. This is great; I have an excuse for my day trip with Clarke.

After finding a couple of pheasant some with two mouths and one that had four eyes, Clarke and I get to camp and are greeted like heroes for bringing back eight birds. We leave them to the warriors and head towards my tent.

When we enter we are amazed at the replica of mount Weather on the table. I ask my guard and he tells me that Lincoln and Octavia had forced the other seconds to make it. 'I contributed the tissue that makes the water.' He added proudly.

I am touched that they took the time to do this replica. Although, I realize they must have been bored out of their minds to make something like this. I will have to find something for them to do before they lose their fighting spirits.

It is now dark out and Clarke takes her leave. 'I am going to go thank Octavia for this. It's practically art.' She adds joyfully, but I see her face change to a stern one as she heads out. She has a commander face like me or any other leader. We need to be stable and not show our weakness to our people as much as to our enemy. That's how I know we aren't enemies; we have both shown our emotions to the other.

I can hear a disagreement between Octavia and Clarke outside my tent. Octavia knows that Clarke and I knew about the bomb at Ton DC before the fact. I tell Chedoux to assign Octavia to be on guard duty at the border so Clarke can get out of that conversation. I get out just as Octavia is turning her back on a pleading Clarke.

'Commander' She says.

'Octavia' I simply answer.

'It is time for the Sudurn most guard post rotation, you should relieve them.' My guard informs her.

'Indra expects me to be on the scouting mission, with Lincoln.' She shoots me a confused look.

'Now you are needed at the guard post, Indra will join you there shortly.' Chedoux answers.

I nod to her and she leaves. I am now looking at Clarke she seems worried and she looks behind me so I turn around. I catch a threatening stare that Octavia shoots at Clarke before rushing of after I caught her in the act. Okay that is the last straw! Chedoux is killing her for her insolence.

Clarke approaches me, while I'm still looking that Octavia follows the orders that have been given to her. 'She won't say anything.' She says.

I'm far from convinced. 'You can't be sure of that.' I turn to look at her. 'Too many people know Clarke.'

This angers Clarke. 'You worry about your people; I'll worry about mine.' and she heads back inside the tent.

I shoot one last look in Octavia's direction and approach Chedoux. _'Pregemo'_*

I head back into the tent hoping to sleep tonight.

* * *

*****_kill her_

Favorite line of the series... I don't know why because I really like Octavia, but every time I hear Lexa say it I smile. Damn that Trigedasleng!


	10. Chapter 10

When I get in my tent, I head towards to my water bottles and pour some on my hands and wash my face. My eyes are itching probably from sleep deprivation. The feeling of the water on my eyelids calms the discomfort.

When I'm done and feel the sleepiness hit me like a tonne of bricks. I finally get tunnel vision to find the bed. I jump in relatively okay afraid that I might have collapsed and made a fool of myself in front of Clarke.

'You need to sleep Clarke.' I mumble face down in bed.

She walks near my bed and crouches

'Sure I'll join you later.' She whispers amused by my sleepiness.

I turn my head trying to hide the smile that takes over.

My eyes finally shut...

**Later**

Loud laughs wake me up. It was a man's laugh; he didn't seem worried, but rather untroubled.

How long had it been since I've heard the laugh of children?

The simple pleasures of peace, children being able to laugh without a care; that is what I miss the most...

I'm not sure how long I've been sleeping, but it's seems to be either very late or very early. I get up slightly and look around the tent. Clarke is nowhere to be found.

Okay, I'm awake now there is no more escaping my responsibilities. I head towards my throne and braid my hair. Once most of the knots have surrendered, I proceed to tie my hair like Anya had taught me... Anya, who I will never see again.

I stared into the nothingness for some time before taking a hold of myself and started to apply my war paint.

I'm about to finish when Clarke walks in with her gun aimed at Chedoux as she throws him towards me.

He looks at me embarrassed and I understand that he was not successful in his mission to kill Octavia. This is an annoyance, now Clarke is angry at me.

'You sent him to kill Octavia. I told you she's not a problem!'

I look at Chedoux angry that my orders were not completed. 'Leave us.'

Chedoux get's up, but is threatened by Clarke's gun.

'No, I'm not letting him out of my sight.'

I get up from my throne to stop this scene, knowing all too well that my warriors do not respond well to threats and guns do not scare them as much as they should.

'Stand down for now and wait for my command.' This gives both parties an honorable exit without any casualties.

Chedoux pushes Clarke off him and leaves.

Then Clarke turns towards me. 'What is wrong with you? You can't just kill everyone you don't trust!'

We are now facing each other. Trust is a fascinating thing. Without it a leader cannot lead. I need to be surrounded by people I trust, if not I put myself and the well being of my people in danger. When I could no longer trust Gustus I had to kill him, it is well understood in my culture isn't it the sky people's?

'Yes, I can.' I respond before moving on to continue getting dressed.

Clarke corners me at my bed and says 'Well I won't let you!'

Putting on armour, I can't help but to think arguing with Clarke is the last thing I want to do this morning.

I let out a sigh. 'You were ready to let her die two days ago nothing has changed.'

'You're wrong, I have!' She states accusingly. Then exasperated she says 'I can't do this anymore.' and heads out.

Before she leaves, I say 'Octavia is a threat...' I walk up to her. 'If you weren't so close to her you'd see that.'

'It's because I'm close to her that I know she's loyal. Her brother is more important to her than anyone. She would never endanger his life.' The anger in her voice is misplaced; she doesn't know the consequences that come with trust when it isn't placed thoughtfully.

'And you're willing to bet everything on that, on your feelings.'

'Yes' She nods staring intently at me. 'You say having feelings makes me weak, but you're weak for hiding from them. I might be a hypocrite Lexa, but you're a liar.'

A liar... what have I lied about?

'You felt something for Gustus, you're still hunted by Costia,'

Oh there's that... but how does she know. I was totally taken aback by these accusations. Clarke starts walking towards me invading my personal space, and I just want to escape those piercing and accusing eyes.

'You want everyone to think you're above it all, but' I hit the table behind me. I have nowhere to go, cornered by this Sky girl.

'I see right through you.'

When did she get this much power over me? She knows my thoughts and is confident that even this close to me I won't harm her. Am I that weak for her?

'Get OUT!' I let out, my jaw tense.

'Two hundred and fifty people died in that village. I know you felt for them, but you let them burn.' She let out in a breath.

It was a military decision. The ones lost in Ton DC were a tragedy and the memory of the ruins brought tears to my eyes. In time of war we all need to make sacrifice. Although there was one I wasn't willing to make. No harm would come to Clarke.

I need to let her know this is how I feel and that her being angry at me pains me deeply.

'Not everyone... Not you.' I see that she's taken aback by this. She examines me to see if I'm being truthful.

'Well if you care about me then trust me. Octavia is not a threat.'

But she is... she knows that I ran away with Clarke before the bomb. If anyone else found out, my neck would not be attached to my shoulders or Clarke would be taken as leverage over me.

'I can't do that.' I answer knowing it would disappoint the woman I love.

'I can't sacrifice my people anymore, if you do anything to hurt Octavia, I'll tell everyone we knew about the missile.' She threatens.

She storms out of the tent. I am now leaning back on the table trying to compose myself.


	11. Chapter 11

Once I catch my breath, I head out of my tent with the intention of catching up to Clarke to tell her she was being unreasonable... wasn't she?

She knows as well as me that our army would collapse without our leadership. Telling them we knew about the bomb would only harm us and our plan to free the people in mount Weather.

I look around, but cannot find her. So I find Chedoux and he informs me that the troops are almost all camped and that they will have a place to rest until the signal. That is good to hear.

I then head towards the fire cooking the meat of a dear some warriors were preparing. I can't sit down the conversation with Clarke always coming back to mind.

I was agitated, walking back and forth in front of the camp fire thinking about the way I stumbled like a fool backing away from Clarke.

I can clearly see the trail of disturbed ground as I keep walking in circles.

Then I look around me. Clarke is sitting on a bench staring at me doing my weird walk.

'Are you stressed out about something in particular Lexa?... I'm sure Bellamy is making progress in mount Weather.' She offers.

'No... it's not that.' I look at her sheepishly. 'I did not mean to anger you earlier.' She smiles at me and suddenly everything is fine. 'Would you like to go hunting or eat?' Then I go towards her and squat down so our eyes meet. 'We can do whatever you want Clarke.' I say placing my hand on her thigh.

She then places her hand on mine and takes it as she gets up.

'A walk sounds nice.' She says playfully looking at the patch of ground I had dug with my nervous walking.

I smirk. 'I will warn my guard to escort us.'

She catches my hand before I can move away and says 'No, I'd rather forget about being at war for a moment.'

'You don't exactly repel danger Clarke, remember the beast?'

'I'll be careful I promise and that was as much my luck as yours.'

True I was not very lucky, 'Fine then... shall we?'

We start walking not talking, but simply enjoying not being alert in each others presence.

Then we see this curious creature, it's a rabbit with three long ears and multiple tails spread on his spine. Somehow it's really cute.

'Lexa can we follow it?' Clarke asks happily.

She is so gorgeous in that moment. Her smile is contagious and I have trouble containing mine after that request. I nod and we continue walking together following the weird little fury creature. It disappears behind a blind hill so we accelerate the pace not wanting to lose sight of it. We were very surprised to see hundreds of wild rabbits staring at us sometimes with six or seven eyes per animal. I'm feeling very observed all of a sudden. Clarke burst out laughing and I see the rabbit we were following squeak (or something) to the others...

So Clarke and I are now running away from a stampede of mutant bunnies who want blood. I can't help joining Clarke's laughter. This is ridiculous.

Clarke stops running suddenly and points up. 'We can hide in the trees until they calm their furry little selves.' and she starts climbing.

I follow her up and a leaping rabbit barely missed my foot with one of its head and fell heads first. It got up from the ground and shook its heads knocking himself out. This whole picture was too much; I couldn't help the laughter that came. Clarke is up a few branches and laughs with me.

I join her in just a few leaps, not trying to show off or anything.

'This is one of the cutest threats to my life since I got to earth.' She says still beaming.

'One of them... You were attacked by cuter things than fluffy bunnies?'

We both laugh. She puts her hand on my knee and looks out in the forest. 'Take it as a compliment' and continues to laugh.

The gang of rabbits leaves after fifteen minutes or so, probably because they were tired of being laughed at or to go terrorize other rabbits by stealing their lunch carrots.

'You know... I haven't laughed like that since my father was flotted. It's really nice... Thank you Lexa.'

As she starts to move towards me on the branch I guess to get down, I hand her my dagger. 'You are one of the Sky people, but you have your place in the trees...' _with me_ I add in my head.

She takes the dagger still looking confused.

'Put your name on this tree to make your place permanent.' I say and she cocks her head sideways and flashes me that smile that makes it hard to breathe. Calm down Lexa! Take a deep breath.

'It is tradition to mark trees with our names it gives meaning to our bond with the trees. We are as much alive as they are. The marks that cover us make us who we are. Carving our name in the tree has its importance. '

'It's like a tattoo.' Her smile tells me she understands it is my way of accepting her into my culture.

'Similar in many ways I guess, it just gives us a place we can call our own and the trees are our refuge.'

She turns towards the trunk and starts carving.

After a few minutes of work she turns to me and smiles. I really want to see so I lean closer to her on the branch to look over her shoulder.

_Clarke _

_Lexa_

was written on the tree.

'We have our place here' she whispers looking back at the carving and then at me.

I nod not knowing how to respond to this gesture. Her face is so close to mine. Her eyes locked on mine, I feel the need to touch her. My gaze leaves the stare and falls to her perfect lips.

'You do.' I barely breathe out.


End file.
